Pretend Play

Paul and I have had the privilege of watching our little girl grow and change daily. It has honestly been one of the most rewarding aspects of parenthood -- watching Maelyn learn new skills and blossom in her interactions with her doting parents, family and friends.

One of the biggest changes has happened over the past week. Maelyn has started to engage in 'pretend play.' It is fascinating to watch Maelyn play out her knowledge of how the world works. It started with pushing the grocery cart that she received from Lianne and the girls all around the house. In the cart she discovered a small tea pot and cup and promptly made us a thousand cups of the best tea Paul and I had ever sampled. Maelyn enjoys playing tea party so much that she will take us by the hand and pat the ground beside her to tell us that she wants us to sit down and serve us her tea specialties.

Maelyn has also really taken to dolls and teddy bears, making them take on human characteristics. She now puts her stuffed animals in the cart, just as she sits in the cart while Mama shops. Maelyn even makes the teddy bears wave and say hello to us while they pass us in the hallway.

While in the bathtub, Maelyn likes to have me put my arm over the side of the tub and douses it in water. She then rubs her hands together and rubs my arm -- just like when we put lotion on her each evening. It was an experience that reminded me so very much of playing beauty salon and house with Brya and Cassidy. You couldn't have peeled the smile off my face if you tried!

Maelyn has also started making Paul and I carry out some of her pretend play -- by grabbing our hands and/or arms and making us do things like hug her teddy bears, turn pages in books, etc. We have a routine at bedtime of hugging as a family, Paul and I kissing each other and then kissing Maelyn. Last night when we started to hug, Maelyn put her hand at the back of my head and started pushing me towards Paul -- she wanted us to kiss! She then proceeded to kiss us over and over again. I felt chocked up and so grateful for my family.

AM told me shortly after we came home from our adoption experience that we would find ourselves loving Maelyn more and more deeply as time went on -- without realizing that a deeper love was even possible. As always, she was so right! I find myself catching my breath when I steal a glance at her and watch her develop and learn daily -- what an amazing privilege it is to be the Mama of such a special little girl.

It is a gift to have friends who we can relate to as parents -- especially as adoptive parents. When we met Leanne and Joad a year ago, we hoped that we would be able to go on this journey together. We knew that it would help to be able to relate to another couple going through the same thing at the same time -- not to mention the joy of having the girls grow up together.

We have been able to get together a few times since we have returned from China. What a blast it has been to see the girls play together and to listen to their giggles.

Leanne and I loved watching the girls run around together on the couch -- their laughter was infectious!

We are so happy to have them in our lives and we are looking forward to years of getting together and watching our daughters and our families grow.

A visit with Maelyn's jie jie's

About six weeks after we got home from China, we were finally able to visit with friends that are more like family - Lianne and my girls. :)

Lianne has been right by our sides throughout our entire adoption process, always taking calls and helping us through any situations we come across, talking on the phone and emailing, often. When summer vacations and plans meant that we didn't get to talk very often for the first six weeks we were home, it made it that much sweeter to be able to visit with Lianne and the girls in person.

The absolute best part of the day was being able to see the three girls together -- and the love that Lianne and her girls give Maelyn so freely is one of the best feelings in the world! It is wonderful to know that our little girl has people who care about her as much as we do -- I think that support system is so very important.

Brya and Cassidy were absolutely fabulous with Maelyn. They played with her and kept her occupied throughout the entire visit -- they didn't tire of her at all!

Even Auntie Lianne got in on the action...

After dinner we went for a walk and headed to the park. Maelyn now loves the park and we had a fabulous time exploring the park together.

On our way to the park, we spotted some ducks at the edge of the pond. The girls fed the ducks and were showing them to Maelyn.

We had a fabulous visit! For me, it was an amazing opportunity to chat with a great friend -- something that I had been in need of very badly! Lianne put up with my non-stop chatter and by the end of the evening, I felt like I had had a wonderful break and the adult interaction I had been needing. :)

We are looking forward to years of wonderful memories with the god-sisters -- we love you all very much!

Happy Birthday!!

Today Maelyn turns two years old. Her first birthday that we have celebrated as a family.

Today is a day of happiness and also a day of reflection. We are thinking of our little girl's birth parents, as I am sure they are thinking of her on this special day. We feel a love for them that is hard to describe. They brought our little one into the world, which then helped to create our family. We wish that we could thank them in person, but we speak to them from our hearts and hope that somewhere in China, they hear our whispers.

Lighting candles...one for Maelyn and one for each of her birth parents

Today is also a  day of joy as we help Maelyn celebrate the milestone of turning two years old. We decided to keep the day low-key, having a get-together with my parents, sister and brother-in-law, and Auntie April. What I can't believe is how excited I was for this day. Celebrations and traditions are very important to me and this is the first time that we got to create our traditions as a family.

We measured Maelyn's height and recorded it on the wall in her closet. Then, we made her hand print and footprint in plaster.

Preparing to make her footprint...

Getting ready for the party...

Opening gifts for the first time....and loving it!

Singing Happy Birthday -- Maelyn loved the candles!

Not certain about the cake at first....only dipping in one finger...

Getting into it -- in goes the entire hand!

Both hands and all over the face...

Looking at herself in the mirror afterwards...

We had a fabulous time celebrating with family and we know that our little girl is so very loved. Happy Birthday, Maelyn!

A long week...

I had always dreaded the moment when Maelyn would get her first cold or flue. I hate seeing others suffer through illness and really didn't want to deal with watching my child feeling sick. What I hadn't bargained for was that all three of us would end up getting sick at the same time.

How do you veteran parents handle the entire family getting sick?!

I have been sick with a bad head and chest cold for about a week now -- but I am finally starting to feel better. I found it really hard to take care of Maelyn all day when all I really want to do was crawl into bed. Then, a few days later, Maelyn caught my cold and the fun really began.

The coughing and sneezing, which was not a pretty sight, was non-stop in this house. Maelyn was quite miserable, ending up with a fever as well. She wanted to be held almost all day long, not accepting a cuddle on the couch in the slightest. I just couldn't hold her all day long, so I pulled out the toddler carrier that I had brought to China. It was the best thing I could have done -- it worked so well! She was very content to be resting and sleeping again me, her head snuggled into me and going with me wherever I went.

I would count down the hours until Paul could come home and help out -- but she always seemed to do better in the late afternoon and evenings, after having had a nap. Sleeping during the night, however, did not go so smoothly. I have been up with Maelyn at night A LOT and I can't wait to get back into our regular sleep routine -- we have been so spoiled with her ability to sleep for twelve hours at a time.

Now it is Paul's turn -- poor guy feels terrible. I cannot wait until we are all healthy again!

A few pics to share...

Helping Daddy take out the trash...

Notice the yogourt spread into her hair??

Attachment Progress

One of the biggest challenges I have faced over the past few months has been the degree to which our little one has clung to me and relied on me for comfort. Sounds like a weird comment, right? What I mean is that I am a fairly independent person and I was not prepared for the fact that someone needing me to be there for them at all times would, at times, feel so overwhelming.

This need has most definitely changed over the past ten weeks. I could probably pinpoint shifts in her attachment and needs on a weekly or bi-weekly basis. In fact, looking back, I can't believe that we have come this far, so quickly. Just like the sleep issues, when you are in it, it feels like it won't ever end. Once it does, you realize just how quickly Maelyn has adjusted to life with our family.

When we first got home, Maelyn would not leave my arms. Getting anything done around the house was nearly impossible. I will always remember the day when she started to play independently, even if it was only for five minutes at a time. I was so proud of her and happy that she was beginning to feel secure in her new home and confident that her Mama and Baba would be able to meet her needs.

Last night was another huge step in the process of Maelyn becoming a secure and independent little creature. I finally went out on my own -- for the first time since Maelyn became a part of our family. I went out shopping for about two hours, while Maelyn stayed at home with Daddy and played the hours away. About an hour into my absence, Auntie Kara and Uncle Cam stopped by for a visit. Together, they all went out for a walk and played. What I couldn't believe was that Maelyn had changed in the short time since I had been away.

All of a sudden, Maelyn was saying 'hello' when holding Auntie Kara's cell phone. She was holding her hands up in question when asked, "Where is.....?" She was looking at pictures of herself on my sister's phone and then pointing to herself and she even started posing for pictures and saying her version of 'cheese!' for the camera. I couldn't believe it -- I only missed two hours of her learning and I ended up coming home to a new child!

Paul and I have been marveling at the changes in Maelyn over the past week. She is turning another corner and becoming much more comfortable with everything. Maelyn is waving at us to come with her and even pats the chair or ground beside her if she wants you to sit with her. She is truly communicating with us and with our family and friends, using sign language and a lot of body language. We are even starting to recognize words that she is attempting to mimic -- made difficult with her open palate. Maelyn continues to astound us everyday and has such an amazing personality.

We have reached a point where Maelyn does not need me all the time -- and ironically, I sometimes find myself missing the little one who clung to her Mama. But only for a second -- as the progress Maelyn has made and the happiness that she exudes every day brings me the greatest joy.

Maelyn and Jake

It's about bloggin' time...

Well, this blogger is finally getting back in the saddle. After eight weeks of being home with our little miss it is time to reclaim my own computer time -- that is, when she is sleeping! That has been one of the most difficult things about being home -- finding time for my own activities. Maelyn loves the computer and wants to play with the keys every time I have the computer out -- so for the most part, the computer stays shut during the day. When she is napping, I am usually scrambling to get things done. When she goes to bed, I have been too tired to even attempt to start returning emails or blog. No longer -- sometimes the dishes will stay in the sink and the floors will keep it's evidence of our last meal...it is time to start blogging again!

The question we get asked the most right now is about how Maelyn is adjusting since returning home from China. The overall response? Maelyn has been doing very, very well -- better than we had ever anticipated. She is an amazing little girl who is extremely resilient and has a fantastic personality. All of that being said and even acknowledging that Maelyn is an easy two year old, it was still hard. Paul and I cannot believe that we have only been home for eight weeks -- it feels like we have been home for a year! The child we brought home is difficult for us to recognize in pictures and in stories -- she has changed that much this summer.

The issue that stands out for most parents is that of sleep -- and it has been a journey for us as well! In China, after a few rocky nights, Maelyn slept quite well. She was then and still is a kid that will fight her sleep with the best of them -- total night hawk. If we allowed her, she would stay up later than Paul and I would! When we came home, changing her sleeping pattern by twelve hours was....interesting. We were so tired and jet-lagged ourselves that it was difficult to put up with the erratic hours that we were keeping while Maelyn was making the transition to our time zone. Looking back, it only took about two weeks before her sleeping become somewhat 'normal.' While we were in it, it felt like it took forever.

At the seminars we attended when we were preparing to adopt, we were told about the night terrors that some of the children experience while their brains are processing all of the changes they have experienced in such a short amount of time. Maelyn is most definitely experiencing night terrors. Normally, our little girl sleeps for about twelve hours -- not too shabby, eh? Unfortunately, her night terrors, which happen a few nights a week, wake us up with pounding hearts. It breaks my heart to hear her screaming, but have realized that she doesn't even wake up when this happens and she gets herself back to sleep within a minute or two.
Last night really warmed my heart. We went through her bedtime routine -- which she knows very well - and hugged her goodnight. It is usually at this point that she would possibly start whimpering and trying her best to be allowed to stay up with us. Last night, however, she hugged us goodnight and she was patting and rubbing our backs, just like we pat and rub her back at night. We said goodnight and our 'I love you's' and she babbled back a response with matching syllables (her version of talking at the moment). Maelyn then waved goodbye to us and went to sleep!

Daily, she brings a smile to our faces and we gaze at her in absolute wonder -- what an amazing little girl.

A few pics to share...

Lookin' cool with Auntie Kara

Enjoying a piece of chocolate cake on our anniversary...

Watching Toy Story with Daddy...